I believe a lot of things I tell myself. I know I shouldn’t, but I do. Honestly, it’s easy to believe that I’m inadequate. Or alone. Insufficient even. I sometimes feel as if I’m not making any difference to those around me, or if I can learn to sincerely trust someone enough to get close enough to me to catch a real glimpse of the brokenness. I know they’re lies that I shouldn’t buy into, but I do.
And in doing so, consequently I have doubts. Doubting that I say the right words or display the right amount of godliness. Doubting I can be a godly brother to my siblings, or if I can lead my future family as a godly father or husband should. I doubt if I’ll ever be able to effectively lead a church and teach them in a way that they desperately need.
Even worse than this however, is what I doubt about God. I read the red words in my bible and have a hard time believing that what Jesus actually promises to those who will simply believe in Him will actually happen to me. Zoom out of the gospel accounts, and it’s hard for me to truly and completely believe in all that is promised in the Word of God to the children of God.
Because that’s what I am, an adopted child of God, of this I am certain. However, the question on my mind is that if I am a child of God, why is it that I feel so alone sometimes? Or if I really have the Spirit of God with me, why is it that I feel so broken more times than not? And if I’m being made into the image of Jesus, why is it that I feel insufficient for what He has called me to?
Let’s follow this train of thought for a second though.
What’s really happening when I doubt the soul comforting, foundational truths the Scriptures present to the people of God? Is it just “something I struggle with and trying to fight through” or something even more serious?
Because God is for me right? Absolutely and without a doubt. The bible makes it clear that you are loved and that your are cared for. God is for you.
But what happens when we or the people around us find difficulty in resting in that assurance? It should be the greatest comfort to us as Christians and sometimes it just isn’t. It certainly isn’t God’s fault, nor His promises since He is holy and righteous in all that He does and faithful to fulfill all His promises. So our greatest comfort should be that this mighty God is for us, right?
Well, not inherently wrong, but a very dangerous conclusion. If left there, we end up with a man centered faith and worshipping a God simply because of what He can do for us. On the contrary, however, everything that God does is to make the most of who He is. What does that mean? That everything He has done for you is ultimately for Him, not ultimately for you.
And we should be thankful it’s not primarily for our good. The greatest news we can hear is that God works all things according to His purpose, not your well being. Yes, we are His and He is our God, but even that finds itself under the umbrella of God displaying His love and grace.
So imagine if this most holy, all powerful, gracious God who is all about displaying His glory does so by saving sinners. Declaring them righteous, continuously making them holy, and ultimately making them a new creation- all because of His Son. Let’s ask ourselves this question: what are we actually doing when we deny the work and revelation of God in doubting who He is and believing the lies of the enemy? We’re not just merely seeing ourselves in a dimly-lit light as it might have been insinuated, but we are denying the very God that saved us.
If you think you’re worthless, you’re forgetting the love of the Father in sending His only Son to redeem His people making you more valuable in the sight of God than we could ever comprehend.
If you feel alone, you’re turning away from the gap that Jesus trekked when He stepped down from heaven and humbled Himself to the point of becoming the very thing He created. You blind yourself to the Spirit He has given who comforts you, intercedes for you, transforms you, and reassures you.
For those of you that think you’re insufficient, don’t be negligent of the fact that our Father has created in you a new heart. One not of cold, dead stone but one of flesh. Symbolizing a new nature not bound to sin any longer, giving you everything necessary to please the Father.
You’re depressed because you don’t belong? You forget that this was never intended to be where you belong and ignore the hope that we have of a new Heaven and new Earth.
You hate yourself? You’re rejecting the love that God has for you.
Comprehending the concept that we consistently come up short of where we are called to be is only half the story folks. At the end of the day, we must remind ourselves that our story does not stop there.
Because yes, God is a God that is for us. And that is very good news.
But even better news than that, God “being for us” stands firmly upon the foundation that God is for Himself. That’s the greatest news. That everything He has done, is doing, and will do is for His glory and make His name great. If you deny your identity, you deny who God has made you. And He’s made you loved, cared for, prized, pardoned, chosen, redeemed, friend, purchased, and adopted and not a single ounce of it was done simply so you could feel all warm and fuzzy inside. No, you are simply a single note in the symphony of all that God is doing and it is entirely done to put the whole collection His glory of display. Let us not forget.